Today I felt a teensy bit guilty about being retired. I was watching other people drive to work and noticed that most of them looked pretty annoyed. I, on the other hand, was smiling and singing a Golden Oldie, on my way to Starbuck’s. As soon as the guilt hit I had to quickly remind myself that it took me close to forty years to reach this point and I really should try to enjoy it.
So why feel guilty? I guess it’s because we retirees no longer "have" to do what all those younger people are still doing – going to work every day and trying to fit their lives in around their jobs. I remember what that was like, too. Literally every minute counted. If I needed to pick something up at the store, I went before work, as long as what I was buying wasn’t perishable.
If I had errands to run, I did them at noon, or after work. Week-ends really weren’t free because I had work to do at home then – all of those chores I hadn’t had time to accomplish during the week.
Like other employees, I went to work when I didn’t feel good, when I was upset over personal issues, was depressed in general or just wanted to be somewhere else. I went to work when problems on site were so overwhelming I would have, for two cents, walked off into the sunset rather than deal with any of them. I took cuts in pay due to budget constraints, listened to people rant about how I wasn’t doing my job (or wasn’t doing it right), and I also made my share of mistakes. That was the unpleasant part.
The good part was, I got a paycheck, met and spent time with wonderful co-workers and had a satisfying career. I pray, too, that I actually helped a few people. I learned a lot about human nature, the world in general, and even about myself. Because I worked in criminal justice, much of it was pretty ugly, but it was well worth the while, even though, at times, it almost wore me out.
These days, as a non-working person, if I wake up in the middle of the night, I don’t fret, because it doesn’t matter if I can’t get back to sleep. In fact, I can even get up at 2:00 AM and watch an old movie, from start to finish, with no interruptions. That is, unless my husband notices I’m gone and wanders out, bleary-eyed and scratching his head, to ask what the heck I’m doing.
I think I can overcome this guilt. It’s minor enough and it’s a good thing, in a way, because it reminds me that this is some "free" time I worked for many years to achieve. Besides, life is still interesting to us retired folk.
Most retired people are still contributing. They work part time, they volunteer and they spend time with their families. Unlike when they were working at full-time jobs, they actually read things that come in the mail and they even analyze the information. They still tend to get up early in the morning, they exercise, stay in contact with other people, watch the news and pay attention to their finances, their homes and communities. Then they get to do those hobbies and interests – the ones they could never fit in, while they were working.
To those who are still reporting for work I say, hang in there and enjoy your jobs for now. Before you know it, you’ll be retired and feeling delightfully guilty, too.
We retired "folk" definitely worked hard to get where we are. Some days, I have a lot to do, and on those days, I "work" hard. Other days, I don't do a darned thing, and I spend the day relaxing. People often ask how I'm spending my retirement and what sorts of things I'm doing with my life. "Nothing!" I say. "I did 'something' for years, and now, I'm being a sloth."
Posted by: Edgar | September 22, 2009 at 04:41 PM